Monday, January 9, 2012

13 Weeks!

Dear Baby Baron,

Sorry for the long delay. We've been traveling and visiting with family for the past three weeks and while I probably had time to write to you, I was more interested in spending time with you and the people that love you.

It's been a long, wonderful, and very sad three weeks.

We flew back to the midwest on the 18th of December. You were such a complete angel on the flight, I was positive the universe was playing a huge joke on us. You were perfect. You slept, you played, you snuggled and you didn't cry.

I was so proud! And relieved.

We got into town and you got to meet your cousins Max and Maddie! Max immediately fell in love with you and it was so precious to watch. He couldn't get enough of you while you were there. Maddie... well, Maddie is another story. She wasn't mean to you and one day, maybe, she will even like you, but that was not this holiday season. She pretty much refused to acknowledge you existed. And that's okay. She's allowed.

You loved Max right back!
You also got to FINALLY meet your Aunt Jenny, Uncle Rod, and cousin Quincy.


You and Quincy aren't old enough to really enjoy each other's company, but more than once you two had some fussing matches. When one of you would start, it would set the other off and you'd fuss back and forth. It was pretty incredible.

You have grown and change so much in the past several weeks, it's awesome! You are getting so big and so strong! You are what your Nene refers to as a "bruiser."

Your hands of uncurled from their previously tiny little baby fists. You are grabbing onto things and holding them. You are laughing. You are smiling. You are conversing with us and you absolutely recognize your mama and your daddy.

You are, simply put, amazing.

This was our first Christmas as a family. Having you with us has made it all the more wonderful. Thank you for being here. Thank you for giving us this family of ours.

All of these Santas and you never cried! I am impressed!

You did get your first cold or allergy fit or whatever it's been. It was absolutely heartbreaking to listen to you cough and see you feeling so bad and knowing there was so little we could actually do to help you. You managed to keep your same wonderful demeanor and a smile on your face. You are awe inspiring.

Unfortunately, the time back in the Midwest was ended by the loss of your Pop. You never got to meet your grandpa Gregg and that is a true shame. I had always envisioned he would get better and you'd spend your summers back in the midwest going between Nene and Nana's houses and your Pop would teach you guitar and give you an education in music. I imagined that you would find him as fascinating as we all always did.

While it seems most people didn't really think I would be affected by his passing, I am heartbroken. He was my dad as much as anyone could have been. He was the male influence in my life, through all of my formative years. He was the father of my sister and the husband of my mother, he was our man. I feel like I was forgotten during the services, that because I wasn't his "real daughter" that I wasn't important to him. I know that isn't true, because I know that he would have loved you just as sure as he loved his "real" grandson. 

I am sorry you won't get to meet him. I am sorry he won't get to know you. 

Someday, you'll get to hear all of his stories from the people that loved him.

Baby boy, you are the light in our lives. You have made our world so much fuller, so much more full of magic that I can hardly contain my joy when I'm with you.

You are forever my sweet, little bruiser.

All of my love,
Your Mama